Living With Allergies

 My son Tucker was diagnosed with a dairy allergy when he was 1 year old.  He was already on soy formula due to hives and rashes when I tried nursing or giving him formula with dairy.  It didn't come as a big surprise when we got the results of the skin test at the allergist's office.  I don't think my husband or I truly grasped the magnitude of how life changing this allergy would become.

 At that age, it's very easy to control what your child eats and they are too young to realize what they can't eat.  His first accidental ingestion came around age 2 when he accidentally consumed a small amount of milk.  His symptoms began almost immediately- throwing up, puffy face, eyes swelling shut. We were scared but thought we could get it under control.  When he began struggling to breathe, we knew it was very serious and we were terrified.  It rocks your world when you see your child unable to take a breath.  Even more frightening was when the nurse told me "the next time, you won't have time to drive him to the hospital- you need to call an ambulance."  That moment changed our lives.  We knew the severity of his allergy and that we had to be more vigilant than ever with everything he put in his mouth. 

  Over the years, I have become a true allergy mom.  I can carry on a conversation with a group of moms at a busy playground and still spot the child carrying a cheese stick heading towards my son.  I always have a wet wipe handy and my purse is filled with dairy free snacks.  I spend hours trying to make delicious dairy free pancakes, cookies, banana bread, etc. And when I have a little down time, I research.  For the last 2 years, I have been reading articles and studies and anything I can get my hands on that have to do with food allergies.  Because while Tucker is a happy 8 year old who is surrounded by amazing people who work so hard to keep him safe, I see the strain in him.  I wipe his tears when he tells me how left out he felt when the sports team went to Dairy Queen or a student brought in a pizza for their birthday at school.  We talk about perspective and how if this is his only cross to bear in life, we are fortunate.  But even more so than feeling left out from time to time, I see the fear in him and I feel it as well.  As he gets older and becomes more independent, the chances for accidental exposure increase.  There's been an anxiety slowly creeping in and I see it in the way Tucker double checks safe foods with me even after I have given him the ok.  I see the anxiety when he turns his cheek when someone leans in to give him a kiss.  I see the anxiety when he frantically wipes his arm after someone brushes past him or checks that his epipens are in their pack that he carries around his waist.  While I like to think of these things as 'self-advocating', I can't deny there's also something else at play.  

  Through my research, I learned that the 'strict avoidance' policy we have been living by since the diagnosis, may not be the best approach to food allergies.  I learned that there are treatments and studies happening now that aim to desensitize the body to the allergen by slowly introducing it in small, controlled doses.  For the first time in many years, I felt a glimmer of hope that my son may not have to live in fear for the rest of his life.